LoK: Lifestyle
by Odeena Sabnach
// Continuing from last time...
// Well after midday, the other five 'kids' wake up and go downstairs for breakfast. Or lunch. Or something like that. Since 'mum' and 'dad' left for work, Vorador is watching TV in the living room, and Raziel is sulking somewhere outside, the five lieutenants have the kitchen all for themselves. After eating their regular share of milk and cereal from their respective bowls, they share with each other the events of the previous night...
Rahab: ...so, after telling Zephon to shut up for the 2897th time, Raziel finally lost it and went to sleep downstairs. Then, I lost it, too, and I went to sleep in the bath tub, and Zephon had the room all for himself. I'm guessing he got bored pretty fast without having anyone to listen to his ramblings.
Zephon: Did not!
Melchiah: Turel, you got a dead spider in your hair.
Turel: *starts* Spider? Where? Get it off!
Melchiah: Chill, it's squashed... man, it was a big one... *holds up the spider and looks at it closely, then suddenly he jumps up and throws it away with a scream*
Turel: What?
Melchiah: It moved a leg! It's alive! It's alive!
Turel: That was just your hand shaking.
Melchiah: ...oh. Sorry.
Dumah: Wampa-wowee-see-shalom, Zephon.
Zephon: ...what?
Dumah: Nak-takka-nah-ways.
Zephon: ...And I thought Rahab was bad. But at least with him I understood what he meant. Well, most of the times. What the hell are you talking about?
Dumah: Last night, I was abducted by five aliens from the planet Zorg and they taught me how to speak Zorgish!
Zephon: Who the hell would want to kidnap something as dumb as you?
Turel: They probably ran out of guinea pigs or something...
Rahab: Well, that makes sense.
Zephon: Point.
Dumah: And they took Cassandra, too! She can also speak Zorgish!
Cassandra: Hiss-s-s!
Dumah: See?
Turel: Really. What did she say?
Dumah: Butter toast!
Turel: ...oh.
// Meanwhile, outside...
// Still in shock from the idea of sharing the couch with Vorador, Raziel is sitting on a bench outside the house and sulking. Suddenly, a red van with hippy symbols doodled all over pulls up in front of the house, and Janos comes out.
Janos: Hi Raz! What's up?
Raziel: *looks up with a miserable expression on his face* I hate my life, I hate the world, and I particularly hate Vorador.
Janos: *eyebrow raised* Why is that?
Raziel: Well, it's like this... The day after we moved in, dad called for Vorador to come and baby-sit us. And that's when it all began...
// Fifteen minutes later...
Janos: So, let me see if I got it straight. Kain is an irresponsible parent, Umah is a tyrant, Vorador is a pedophile, and your brothers are idiots.
Raziel: Yep.
Janos: I... see. Looks like you people really need a sane person around the house.
Raziel: Yep.
Janos: Therefore, I'll move in.
Raziel: ...what?
Janos: Well, to tell the truth, I flat ran out of cash, and the owner of the hotel I used to live in just threw out my stuff and slammed the door in my face, telling me never to return.
Raziel: *to himself* Wow... that seems to be happening a lot lately...
Janos: What was that?
Raziel: Well, the same thing happened to Vorador. That's how he and Umah came to stay with us.
Janos: Really? Damn, I kept telling him that this will happen sooner or later... Anyway, don't worry. Things are seriously going change around here.
Raziel: Janos, you're an angel.
Janos: *flattered* Thanks! ...does that mean you finally admit that my wings are prettier than yours?
Raziel: No way, my wings are prettier.
Janos: No, mine!
Raziel: No, mine!
Janos: No way, mine!
Raziel: No, mine!
Random Extra Dude: Here they go again...
~ To be continued ~