LoK: Lifestyle
by Odeena Sabnach
// It's not something uncommon for the great and mighty Kain to hate the world. But today, it seems, he hates it more than he usually does. Particularly, he hates his sons, the entire Nosgothian school system, his unlife, and, last, but definitely not least - Umah.
Kain: *gets out of a cab in front of the school from where his 'kids' got expelled and prepares to slam the door shut*
Driver: Hey buddy, you forgot to pay.
Kain: Get lost, I'm not giving you any money.
Driver: What?
Kain: *annoyed* You heard what I said. Now go away!
Driver: Look here, pal. I have a gun right here in my glove compartiment, and I'm not afraid to use it. So it's either the money or--
Kain: *growls and shows his impressive fangs* Or what?
Driver: *intimidated* Well, I... uh... never mind. Eh... I guess I'd better be going... now...
Kain: Yeah, you'd better do that, before I lose my temper. I tend to get really nasty when I do.
Driver: All right... have a nice day, and... wait a minute! You're Kain! Kain, from the night club! Aren't you?
Kain: *lifts an eyebrow* Yeah... So?
Driver: I'm your biggest fan! I come there every night just to see your number!
Kain: You... do that?
Driver: Yeah!
Kain: But that's a ladies' club! How do you...
Driver: Oh, never mind that. So... *flirty* you wanna go get a can of blood or something?
Kain: Are you gay?
Driver: Well, if that's the way you put it... yes, I am.
Kain: *sweetly* Well, in that case, go find someone who cares. *slams the door shut and teleports away*
Driver: Hey, wait! You still owe me five bucks!
// Let's leave Kain and his not-so-contended fan settle their differences now and turn our attention once again to the new residence of the Circle of Nine, where all its members - except for Bane, who had fallen asleep in DeJoulle's lap - are deep into thinking...
Ariel: *obviously sarcastic* So, tell us again about your plan, Moebius. I'm not sure I got all the details right.
Moebius: *looking very smug* All right, if you do ask for it... My plan goes as follows: I give the rest of you the potion, and you must find a way to make Kain and the others take it.
Ariel: Oh, yeah. That's brilliant. I must say, I'm impressed.
Moebius: *hopeful* You are...?
Ariel: Not!
Moebius: Fine then! Who needs you! Does anyone else have an idea...?
Mortanius: Hash says we could make a cake and have them eat it.
Moebius: Excellent idea! Does anyone know how to make a cake?
// Silence
Moebius: ...right.
Malek: Let's try something else, something simpler to make. A sandwich or something.
Nupraptor: Since when do vampires eat sandwiches?
Malek: *glares* Don't interrupt me, Brain. I'm in the middle of exposing an idea here.
Nupraptor: Oh, right... As if you could.
Malek: What's that supposed to mean?
Nupraptor: Well, technically speaking, you don't have any brain. So, you can't think at all.
Malek: You! *tackles Nupraptor and both guardians roll on the floor, clenched together*
Moebius: *lifts an eyebrow at the ensuring fight, and then shrugs* So... what else could we use?
Bane: *wakes up* Urgh... peanut butter and jelly... *falls asleep again*
Ariel: Peanut butter and what?
Anacrothe: You know... this gives me an idea. Why don't we invite them to a tea party and slip the potion into the tea?
Moebius: Wait... I think I have an idea. Why don't we invite them to a tea party and slip the potion into the tea?
Anacrothe: That's just what I said.
Moebius: *glares* Really? When?
Anacrothe: Five seconds ago...
Moebius: *waves his staff* No you didn't.
Anacrothe: Wha... where am I?
Moebius: *chuckles* And now that we got that settled... does anyone volunteer to make the tea...?
// Although it would be fun - at least in my view - to watch the nine (minus four) sorcerers and sorceresses try to make tea, there are more pressing matters at hand, as a completely unexpected visitor arrives at Kain's house...
?: *rings the doorbell*
Raziel: I'll get it! *bolts to the door* Who is it?
?: Wouldn't you like to know! Is Janos at home?
Raziel: *shouts* Hey Mommy! There's someone looking for you!
Janos: *teleports besides Raziel* Ssh, not so loud! Timée is asleep!
Raziel: *lifts an eyebrow* Timée...?
Janos: Yes, that's how I named her. Isn't it pretty?
Raziel: Whatever... There's someone at the door looking for you.
Janos: There is...? *opens the door* Hello, how may I help--*jaw drops*
Angel: *waves her hand* Hello!
Janos: Your... wings... they're...
Raziel: *not wanting to miss the opportunity* Prettier than yours!
Janos: *lost in reverie* And definitely prettier than yours will ever be...
Raziel: *glares at Janos, then shrugs and leaves*
Angel: I heard someone here needs help in babysitting a demon kid?
Janos: Well, as a matter of fact, that would be me.
Angel: Goodie! In that case, I'm here to help. So where is the little angel?
Janos: Upstairs... sleeping... but...
Angel: Great! I'll go make myself a cup of hot chocolate then. *pushes past Janos and into the house*
Janos: *looks after her, and then sighs quietly and closes the door*
Angel: *from the kitchen* Got sugar...?
// To be continued