Why Potions are bad for your sanity

by Odeena Sabnach

Chapter 2: When Lilly gets *really* mad

James Potter looked up from the Marauders' Map, "This is it."

The others - Sirius, Remus, Peter and a very nervous looking Alicia - exchanged glares. "And what", said Sirius, "would Lilly do here, of all places?"

'Here' was a chamber burried deep in the dungeons of Hoghwarts. The door was locked.

"Geez, I dunno, maybe someone got tired of her and locked her away", said Alicia, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "That wouldn't be surprising."

"Hey!"

"Oh, come on, James, you know I'm right! Let's just get this over with, shall we? Alohamora!"

The door flung wide open.

"Lumos!"

But, much to their surprise, at the light of Alicia's wand, the startled Marauders saw a young MAN, with long, red hair and a moustache and wearing a Gryffindor uniform (skirt included), staring back at them. "L-Lilly?" was all James could utter.

"James!" The young man looked panicked. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Looking for you", said Alicia, taking a step forward. "Severus kinda needs your help - but then again, it looks like you're in need of help as well. Guess you drank out of his goblet, too?"

The man narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "What - do you mean with that?"

"Nothing!" Sirius cut in. "She meant nothing! Listen, I can--"

"The boys pulled a prank on Severus. They poured a gender-changing potion into his goblet at lunch. And since you seem to be affected as well, then my only guess is that you drank from it as well. Am I right?"

But Lilly was no longer listening to Alicia. Her wand was already in her hand.

"Run", squealed Peter, and in the blink of an eye the four Marauders were gone, and the door slammed shut behind them.

"Whoa, nice trick!" said Alicia, with mocking admiration. "Umm... what are you doing here?"

"Well, I was--searching for a way to reverse whatever happened to me." Lilly pointed to a pile of books on the floor. "I definately can't show up at Gryffindor Tower looking like this. Especially not wearing a skirt."

"And Severus has the same problem, minus the skirt." Alicia grinned. "Gotta hand it to the Marauders, when they pull a prank--"

"Shut up", hissed Lilly. "Look, why are you here, anyway?"

"Because Severus asked me to look for you. Otherwise I wouldn't care and I'd be miles away. But since you're here and looking for an antidote to reverse this thing, then I suppose I might as well stay and help you."

Lilly's jaw nearly dropped in shock, "What? Why would you help me?"

"For Severus", answered Alicia simply.

"Oh. Well, I put a cushioning charm on the door, you can sit there. I've already searched through a few books, but I didn't find anything."

"You know what they say, two heads are better than one. I think I'll look in that big and dusty tome over there."

~

It was later.

Much later.

Alicia looked up from the book she'd been studying. "Found anything?"

Lilly sighed, "Nothing."

"Same here." Alicia looked at her watch. "Damnit", she muttered.

"What?"

"I just missed Astronomy."

"Oh."

"One of the few subjects I actually like... Oh well."

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Lilly and Alicia exchanged a glare, then Alicia stood up. "Who is it?" she asked.

"Sirius", came the reply. "I brought you a snack."

But Lilly was already at the door. She opened it, hurled Sirius inside and then slammed it shut, putting a locking charm on it for safety. Her wand was trained on the Marauder.

"Well, mister Black, tell me a good reason why I shouldn't put a hex on you right now", she hissed.

Alicia stepped in between the two quickly. "Because", she said hurriedly, "he's gonna help us."

Both Lilly and Sirius looked at her startled, "What?"

"Yes, you heard me. Sirius is gonna help us. Three heads are better than two. Won't you, darling?" she asked sweetly.

"Yes! Sure! Anything!" said Sirius, glad to be still alive and in one piece.

"But first, let's eat something, shall we? I'm starved."

For the first time, Lilly grinned. "Let's. But", she said, lowering her voice, "don't think you're off the hook, Sirius. I'll still get you for this."

Despite himself, Sirius shuddered. Then, all three set to eat.