Just A Normal Day

by Odeena Sabnach

Things were finally starting to settle around my uncle and aunt's house. Actually, I could even say it was kinda... cool.

Oookay, so we had the regular three-times-a-day Rattrap and Dinobot fights, plus the other conflicts I had to cool down before anyone (or anything) got damaged. Thankfully, Optimus and Megatron did an excellent job with keeping everyone in line.

Air Razor and Black Arachnia's cooking was excellent. Even though the guys ate industrial quantities of food, that problem was quickly solved when Quickstrike and Tarantulas happily went to do the groceries. Over and all, maybe this vacation wasn't so bad after all.

Or was it...?

"Would you pass the popcorn?"

I smiled sweetly at Terrosaur. "Sure."

This was the first time we were actually alone. Of course, we were watching 'Godzilla' on DVD, but heck, we were alone, and only that mattered.

"So, how do you like the movie?"

He grinned. "It's ultra."

"Riiight. Any thoughts of sharing that popcorn?"

"Um... sure."

"Thanks."

"Anytime. Gimmie that cola shake, will you?"

"Here. Don't drink it all, I'm thirsty, too."

"Uh-huh. *gulp* Slag, I drank it all."

"You jerk!"

"Look me in the eye and say that again."

"Um... want some chocolate?"

"No thanks, it's fatning."

"You--"

*Ding!*

"Slag. Would you get that?"

"Um... nope?"

"Please?"

"No."

*Dingdingding*

"C'mon, pretty--oh forget it. Rattrap! Get the door!"

Rattrap turned from the poker game he'd been playing. "No way!"

"Grr, GO!"

"No!"

"*snarl* Obey your commander, vermin."

"Says who?"

"*snarl* Do it, or else."

*Dingdingding*

"*Roaaar!*"

"Okay, okay, I'm goin'. Sheesh."

Rattrap grumbled all the way out of the living room. Terrosaur and I exchanged a glance, and we both smirked. The movie was coming to that part where the Godzilla eggs start to hatch and all.

"So, are you scared, Terrosaur?"

"Nah..."

"Me neither. I've seen scarrier stuff."

"Like Dinobot in his pink dress?"

"*snarl* Do not talk about that."

"Like, sure."

I chuckled evilly. Terrosaur was about to say something, when a high-pitched scream came from the hallway. Then, the door opened, and a very frightened-looking Rattrap stormed in.

"It's a monster!!" he shrieked. "Run for yer life!"

With that, he rushed up the stairs, and a little while after, I could hear the sound of a slamming door. I shrugged.

"He probably saw my neighbours. Dinobot, go cool him down."

"Why me?"

"I dunno, you're a warrior, it'll make him feel safe or something. Besides, I amyou commander, right?"

Dinobot sighed and started up the stairs.

"I'm going to check it out", Terrosaur stated, and he went for the hallway. I turned my attention back to the movie. Blood and guts... Cool!

Terrosaur's shriek nearly broke my ears. The Predacon dactyl burst into the living room and slammed the door. "You have to leave", he said in a firm voice. "Now."

With that, he turned off the DVD.

"Hey, I was watching that!" I scowled at him. "What in the Pit is going on?"

"There's a... thing outside. It looks deadly. Please, go somewhere safe! I'll dispose of him!"

I chuckled. I had a vague idea of what that thingmight be...

"You mean--"

Just then, the door to the living room flew across the room, and a tall, silver 'bot with crimson red optics walked in.

Terrosaur resisted the urge to back away and stepped in front of me protectively. "Run", he half-whispered. "I'll keep him busy."

"That won't be necessary."

I knew that 'bot. Knew him all-too-well. And he knew me, too, because he quickly backed away.

"I'm--sorry--I--I--didn't--"

"Hello, Dinobot", I said, smiling as sweetly as I could. He flinched. "Where did you learn to use a door?"

"I..." He was looking for an honorable answer.

Terrosaur gulped. "This... this is TM2 Dinobot?"

I nodded.

"He looks even scarier than I immagined..."

I whacked him. "Dinobot is NOT scary. Got that?"

He flinched. "Yeah, yeah... I.... guess I'll go to my room now." He turned and quickly fled up the stairs.

I couldn't help it and I burst out laughing. It took me a while to calm down, but eventually...

"Oookay. So you finally decided to show up, huh?"

He avoided my gaze.

"Anything you'd like to share with me, like perhaps WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE PAST SLAGGIN' TWO MONTHS?"

By the time, I was shouting, but I didn't really care.

Dinobot flinched. "I had my reasons for going away."

"And what might those reasons be?"

"I... cannot tell you. I demand to see Optimus Primal."

"I'm in command now" - he made a face - "so you can talk to me."

"Negative, I--"

Fortunately for both of us, Optimus, Dinobot and Rattrap, who had been watching the scene for a while, decided it would be a good time to intervene.

"Ahem."

TM2 Dinobot turned to Optimus. Rattrap flinched.

"Oh, man. An' I thought one Chopperface was bad enough."

The two Dinobots glared at each other for a moment, then they both hissed, "Shut up vermin."

Optimus cleared his throat.

"Well, you're finally back with us, aren't you."

Nod.

"And this time, you're here to stay, right?"

Nod.

"Why'd you leave like that?"

Shrug.

"Um... okay."

Nod.

Yeesh. Optimus SUUURE knows how to handle a conversation. Right?

"Okay, Dinobot. You can stay with us. Since I moved in with Rattrap and Dinobot, you can have my former room. But I'm warning you: break anything, and I'll have 'raptor steak for lunch. Capiche?"

Nod.

"Ooookay."

After I showed Dinobot his new room and held him a lecture about stuff he shouldn't do, I went to search for Terrosaur. When I finally found him, I dragged him back downstairs... finding something I didn't want to find.

'Godzilla' was almost over. Rattrap, Waspinator and Tarantulas were sitting on the couch and munching off the last remains of popcorn.

"Hey!!!"

All three 'bots started up in surprise. "Oh, hi... I thought you was gonna be busy with da Chumperface for a while", Rattrap said. "An'... um... why are ya smirkin'?"

My grin widened. "Sure, since you guys ate up out popcorn, you can always go make more..."

Rattrap was going to argue over that. I didn't give him the chance.

"Or you can watch 'Barney'. I have some new episodes--"

"Okay. Where'd ya say da popcorn machine was?"

Terrosaur and I exchanged a glance, and we both smirked as we took our rightful place on the couch.

"So, do you wanna see 'Gladiator?'"

"Sure I do!"

"Okay. Inferno!"

"Yes, my Queen."

"Play the 'Gladiator' DVD."

Inferno rushed to obey my order, and I sighed. Life was good...

~~*Later that day*~~

"Have you seen Skorpi?"

I raised my eyes from the cards I was hoding and glared at Air Razor. "Um... nope. Twenty to you, Cheetor."

"That's odd. He promissed he'd fix the microwave, only he's not anywhere in sight. I've been looking everywhere."

"Maybe he just changed his mind. Gimmie three."

"Drat." The look on Terrosaur's face was priceless.

"Well, you win some, you loose some. Right?"

Just then, Megatron entered. The poker players (Cheetor, Inferno, Terrosaur and I) hardly noticed him, so we all started up and dropped our cards when he thundered, "Where is Rampage?"

"Yeesh, you sure know how to ruin a perfectly good game", I bellowed at him, carefully picking up my cards, and trying to catch a glimpse of what the others had. Cheetor had a flush. Terrosaur had a full house, and Inferno had nothing. Drat. I only had a pair of deuces. Eh, well. Time to bluff a little.

"I call you, Terrosaur."

"Oookay. I raise 25."

"Gimmie one."

"I'm out."

Smart thing to do for Inferno. Don't be surprised...

I heard the phone ringing somewhere in the living room. "Um... would someone get that, please? I raise 50."

Terrosaur's optics widened. "Whoa."

"I raise fifty more", Cheetor said.

"And I raise 20."

"I call you, Cheetor."

"Slag. I'm out of credit. I drop."

I smiled to Terrosaur. "Looks like it's all down to you and me, Terror. Gimmie your best shot."

"Okay. I... um, I raise ten more."

"Cautious I see. Hmm, looks like your luck has fled. I have--" I stopped in mid-sentence. "I almost gave that away!"

"Slag! I call you."

"Oookay. One last chance. I raise a hundred."

"That's it. I drop. You wouldn't do that unless you had a royal flush."

I smirked. "Oh, yeah, I had a royal... pair!!" I chirped happily, shoving my cards in his face.

"Oh. Slag."

"Odeena!" That was Air Razor's voice coming from the living room. "Come here, quick!"

Drat, there goes my moment of triumph. Winning over Terrosaur ain't something that happens every day.

"Odeena!" That was Optimus. "C'mon!"

"Okay, okay, keep your skidplate on, you ape. I'm coming."

I went for the living room. Judging by the look on Air Razor and Optimus' faces, they had bad news. But how bad?

Optimus motioned to the phone in an inviting gesture. I picked it up.

"Hello, this is Odeena, who--Skorpi!"

"Hi", Skorpinok answered.

"Where the slag are you?"

"Um..." there were some muffled voices in the background, "you really, really DON'T want to know."

"We're sorry", there was a weird chorus in the background. I recognized Rattrap, Quickstrike, Tarantulas, and possibly Rampage.

"Sorry for what? What's going on?"

Silence.

"Skorpi? What in the Pit is goiong on?"

"You won't like this", Skorpinok warned. "We're... um, kinda..."

"WHERE?"

"In... jail", he finally spat it out.

I choked.

"Jail?"

"We're sorry! Please, don't leave us here!"

"Jail?" I repeated, leaning on Optimus for support. Not that... anything but that...

"What did you guys do?" I tried to be calm. Losing your temper can be bad for the health.

"Nothing much! I swear, all we wanted to do is get something nice for you! But then Rampagewent postal on some guys."

I felt my knees giving up. "Rampage... did... what?" I gasped.

Trials, sentences, prison... al this was passing before my eyes.

"He didn't have the chance to kill anyone", Skorpinok supplied quickly.

I sighed in relief. Skorpinok went on.

"Not that he didn't try to... But we stopped him. And then, the police came."

"Who else is with you?"

After a brief pause, Skorpinok answered, "Rattrap, Rampage, Quickstrike, Tarantulas, and Dinobot."

"Dinobot...?"

"Classic."

"Uh-huh."

I heard something that ressembled to a fight in the background, then Dinobot's voice came through.

"We need your assistance for our release. The guardians said that you can bail us out."

"Bail you out, huh?" I chuckled evilly. "Now why should I do that, hmm? I mean, it would all be SO quiet without you guys running around and causing trouble... right?"

"Please!" Dinobot sounded desperate. "We'll be good!" he pleaded, and there was a chorus of 'Yes' in the background.

Hmm... what to do, what to do... Sure, I could just leave'em in jail. After all, they deserved it, right? On the other hand though--

"Well?"

I sighed. "I'm coming over there."

Dinobot sighed in relief, and I hung up.

"Trouble?" Megatron asked from behind me. I turned and scowled at him.

"YOUR minions are causing it. You'll give me a ride to the police, now. Optimus, stay here and be on the lookout. Those guys are in trouble."

All the 'bots present flinched at my tone, and I smirked.

"Shall we go?" I asked Megatron sweetly.

He nodded. Here we go again.

The guys behind bars were an uncommon sight alright. Rattrap was grumbling to himself, Dinobot stared blankly at the wall in front of him, Skorpinok and Quickstrike were chatting on one of the bunks, Rampage was sulking, and Tarantulas was asleep on the other. They all jerked up when they saw Megs and I.

"Thank the Matrix!" Rattrap burst out. "I thought ya'd never come!"

"Hold it, Rat-Face. Who says we're here to bail you out?"

His jaw, as well as everyone else's, dropped. "Wh-what...?" he asked weakly.

"Before I make a decission, I want you to tell me what happened." I scowled at Rampage. "Allof it."

"Well..." Skorpinok shifted uncomfortably. "It's like this."

As much as I could figure, the guys had gone to a mall in search for something nice to buy for me, Black Arachnia and Air Razor. Of course, Tarantulas and Quickstrike were the only ones that knew how to use a credit card. In the end, they picked up some... their story got really twisted at this point, but I understood it--or they--were so expensive, that Rampage had gone postal on the salesperson when he heard the price. Then the mall cops had arrived, and, at Dinobot's unexpected suggestion, they all surrendered. End of story.

I frowned thoughtfully. "I warned you guys about what would happen if you do this. Now tell me, what should I do with you?"

"Bail us out?" Quickstrike suggested sweetly. I shook my head.

"No can do. I don't have that much money."

"Yes you do", Rattrap protested. "'Bolts told us we had--"

"That money is supposed to last for the whole vacation."

"So, we'll all get jobs an' pay you back! Please, PLEASE don't leave us here!"

I finally nodded. "Okay. Fine. I'm bailing you out. But this is the first--and LAST time I do that."

To make a long story short, I bailed the guys out, and we all returned home, happilly ever after.

Or not.

The moment Megatron opened the main door, thick black smoke emerged outside. I could hear Air Razor's voice, "I knew I should've waited for Skorpi to fix that thing!"

Talk about a cliche.